Barbecues and boobs
8:01 p.m.
Now I cannot let this go without some kind of catty comment, but this time it is not about any of my colleagues, even though one of them would never acknowledge me unless I greet him first, but as I said, this is not about him. There are a couple of young women in the department, singers of course, sopranos yet, who dress in a rather specious fashion. One of them was actually a student of mine in her first year who left me because she had been twisted by uncollegial colleagues, but this is not about that. No, this is a purely fashion statement. Both girls are overweight. Both have enormous boobs. Both dress in such a way that there is nothing left to the imagination regarding their not-very-attractive bodies. Last night, at the party at the loft, one of these girls was wearing a top that plunged to where her bra separated her massive mammaries and revealed quite a bit more decolletage than I would consider desirable or even respectable. Her friend�s bosom at least was covered, but she wore a very short skirt which revealed her substantial thighs. Tonight the first girl showed up at the barbecue but was apparently off to something a little more formal. She was wearing a black dress, figure hugging (did I mention that she�s overweight?), that plunged again too low for comfort, and this time revealed even more cleavage than last night�s garment. It was distracting in the extreme.
What makes this especially disturbing is that this girl has a very young-looking face, very fair skin with red hair, and she looks like she should be sweet and innocent. Instead she is parading her attributes in this tasteless clothing, and everyone is too polite to actually say, �You know, honey, you look like a fat cow with a big udder.� When I was her teacher, I tried to point out to her that redheads should not wear pink, her especially, but pink is her favourite colour, and she just got angry with me. So I�m not going to point out how bad she looks. I just thought I�d let the rest of you know though. Whatever you�re imagining, it�s worse.
from tcklyrpharsn :
Man, who cares if they're fat? Let them wear what they want! If they feel sexy, then let them. What does it matter to you?
from elgan :
Hahahaha! What does it matter to me? What does it matter to you? I'm allowed to express my disgust at being forced to see more boob than one would find on the cover of an x-rated video, and not nearly as attractive either, in my own diary, n�est-ce pas?
from tcklyrpharsn :
Of course you are allowed! Far be it for me to say you are not allowed to express something in your own diary. I am just genuinely interested to know why it bothers you so much to see a little fat boobie, that�s all.
from elgan :
I guess it bothers me because it wasn�t a little fat boobie, it was way too much fat boobie, so much, in fact, that I was worried it would spill out of her bra and we would then be treated to a view of her nipple as well. It may have made her feel sexy, but unfortunately it did not make her look sexy, just cheap and tawdry.
from tcklyrpharsn :
Well, I�ll agree that NOBODY wants to see nip at a BBQ (okay, maybe some people do, but not this cat). I guess I just wondered at the violence of the disgust in the entry: �fat cow� and �figure hugging (did I mention that she�s overweight?)� and so on. Just making sure you�re not a Fatist. ha!
from elgan :
Maybe I am a �Fattist�, but the few guys and gals I have dared approach regarding this flagrant flaunting of flesh have agreed with me that it is in poor taste, especially considering the unattractiveness of the flesh on display. I don�t really mind fat people, just as long as I don�t have to observe them naked.
from tcklyrpharsn :
Well, as long as you admit that you�re a Fattist (and thanks for correcting the spelling, btw; I haven�t had much occasion to use the term before now!). It�s one thing to not want to see tits in public, but if it�s �especially [intolerable?] considering the unattractiveness of the flesh on display�, then I think that does make you a Fattist. As long as you�re comfortable with the title.
from tcklyrpharsn :
Um, and am I alone in seeing a connection in attitude between a statement like: �I don�t really mind fat people, just as long as I don�t have to observe them naked� and �I don�t care if they�re gay, as long as I don�t have to see them kiss�? Not trying to be volatile; something to think about, maybe?
from elgan :
It�s interesting you should make that connection, since I don�t mind seeing gay people kiss as long as they�re not �sucking face� in public. Call me a prude, if you will, but I think certain behaviours belong in certain environments, provocative dressing and overt displays of affection being among them, regardless of the sex or heft of the participants.
from tcklyrpharsn :
Well, I won�t argue with that. If you truly feel that way �regardless of the sex or heft of the participants�, then I have no quarrel with you. It�s only if it�s the gayness or the �heft� that bothers you that I might want to pick a fight.
from teranika :
Hi Elgan, of course you are entitled to feel that certain clothing doesn�t suit certain people in certain situations (especially in your own diary!)... That being said: I am a rather voluptuous female (American size 12-16, DD cup). I work out and eat healthfully, but I was simply born to be in a Rubens painting. It makes me a little uncomfortable to hear the opinion that sexy clothing on a hefty woman is somehow *less* appropriate than it is on a thin woman in the situation you described (if indeed that is what you were trying to say). Because in faculty situations, ALL sizes and genders are advised adhere to a professional standard!!! (and somehow I think this was your main point, simply embellished by your reaction to the woman's size.) On this I agree fully with you, that the professional academic setting is not a wise situation to flaunt your riches. (Although, I am dying to dig into my short skirts and tight blouses, if only to drive my disgusting sexist chairman to have a heart attack and be forced to go into retirement...yet another awful story about him today.) In spite of my size, I really feel sexy in figure-hugging clothing that shows my cleavage and shapely legs, because my figure is what God gave me, and I feel that I know how to carry myself. I know that my more conservative family members gasp at this behavior, while my European friends applaud and encourage. Living in Queens, I see so many bodies of so many sizes - and these women are simply SEXY! It has nothing to do with weight - it is an ATTITUDE! Ah well. I leave with this comment from my colleague, �Honey, don�t give �em what you can make �em pay for.� (applies no matter what the size).
from elgan :
Hello teranika, it�s always a pleasure to hear from you. I agree with you completely that professional people in a professional environment should dress appropriately for the work place. Unfortunately, the two bodies I was referring to do not belong to faculty, but to students, and there is no dress code for students. One would hope that good taste would prevail, and that people have friends who let them know that a certain style does not flatter. This does not appear to be the case. My own husband, who is as red-blooded as I have ever met, says that their mode of dressing has just the opposite of the presumed intended effect on him, which I�m positive is not what the girls were planning on. It is not so much their size that bothers me (one of my own students is much larger, but always dresses modestly, and for her recital last year wore a gown which was very beautiful and tasteful), but their lack of awareness of how awful they really look. time2 actually suggested that I should have thrown a grape down the one girl�s cleavage. Anyway, I hope we�ve done with this topic for now.
from teranika :
Hi again Elgan. One person�s blue is another person�s indigo is another person�s teal. I suspect that words about fashion and body weight evoke different images to everyone because they evoke emotion. I suspect in fact this is a true case of, �you had to BE there!�
<~~~ * ~~~>
