I�m bummed out, in more ways than one.

Today started out well enough. I walked to the university with my two wonderful kids, had a very good Latin class, and then was given a phone message by the slide librarian that the dean was looking for me. I tried calling him, but he was on the phone, so I just wandered over to his office instead. And that�s when my day took a sharp nosedive.

Remember how I was complaining last week about this new student who balked when I tried some new stuff on her? I could have told you she had an attitude--actually, I think I did tell you that--but I was particularly surprised to hear that she had talked to the chair and said that she wanted to change teachers--after one lesson! In fact, she was so upset, saying that I was trying to take her in vocal directions she didn�t want to go in, that if she didn�t get a different teacher, she would quit the university.

Now, the government has put so much pressure on institutes of higher learning to graduate more people, something they call �retention�, that they will fall over backwards to accommodate students. Personally, I think this is a little ridiculous. After all, university is not for everyone, if someone can�t make the cut, they shouldn�t be coddled and spoon fed so they can graduate. That�s just wrong. On the other hand, if someone is good enough to go to a university, they should expect that they are going to have to learn stuff, and maybe not stuff they particularly want to learn, but stuff that will in the end make them smarter. For instance, an English major does not tell his professor that he doesn�t want to read SaIinger, or C0nrad. If the teacher assigns novels by these authors, he reads them, writes the essays, or fails. It�s simple.

So, this student, whom I had never heard sing before, mentioned to me at the department barbecue that she has never really done any fioratura, so I chose a piece for her that has lots of runs and flourishes in it because this is something she should know how to do. I also introduced breathing exercises that would help in the pursuit of this goal. But she told the dean, when he spoke to her, that she had a pretty good idea of where she was going with her voice, didn�t like the pieces I had assigned, and wants to switch because she feels that I am trying to change her, after only one fucking lesson!

I explained to the dean all these things, that in that first lesson I was getting to know her as much as she was getting to know me, and that she couldn�t expect that I wouldn�t want to make changes where I perceived she needed to improve. I suggested that he talk to this girl, face to face, and explain that she should give her teacher another chance, that perhaps she was too hasty, and that she should expect that at the university level she is going to have to work a bit harder. I told him that I�m a singing teacher, not a hairdresser.

The other shock, which is a harder blow, is that the girl who would have gone to bible college but decided instead to come back to school, the girl who was so excited to start singing lessons with me, has also asked to change teachers, for largely the same reasons. This I don�t understand. I am really, really hurt with this one. I think she must have been talking to someone, or been influenced in some way. We had a great rapport, or at least I thought we did, and we were talking about repertoire and all the fun stuff she would start doing this year, especially towards planning her recitals for next year and the year after. Now I feel as though I�ve been slapped in the face. Both girls assured the dean that there was nothing personal in this, they both like me very much, they just felt that I was not taking them in the direction they vocally want to go.

So, I asked my baritone, the drama student who opted to take voice as a second instrument, why he had done so, and he responded that he felt I was a good singing teacher and that he had a lot to learn from me, even though he didn�t need the extra credits and the lessons are costing him quite a bit on top of his regular tuition in differential fees. I felt vindicated by that. But I�m still shaken and upset.

I know I�m a good singing teacher. I only have to hear the results to know that I make a difference. The teacher these girls want to switch to has a fine reputation, but I don�t really hear much in terms of improvement in her students. From what I�ve heard from her former students or people who have accompanied them in lessons, she only really makes the effort with her best, most promising singers. Others learn their pieces, she corrects their pronunciation, gives them some musical direction, but doesn�t really try to correct their technique. I know this from working with the girl in choir last spring, the one who had never been told that she would find it much easier to sing if she opened her throat.

Well, with this on my mind, I went to a union meeting of the contract faculty, where such matters as contract negotiation were discussed. I couldn�t stay to the end, as I had to run home and get ready for belly dancing. That actually helped me unwind, all that bum squeezing and hip locking. I bought a pair of zills, the finger cymbals dancers use, so that made me feel a little better, too.

You know, if it weren�t for students like my baritone, I would just quit this business altogether.

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